I Will Follow Him

To my fellow sinners,
Enjoy!

Enough Said.
xxx
Gv the MC

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The Virgin Whore

What happens in her vagina, stays in her vagina!

So my next story is becoming the all-to-familiar tale of the young girl who wants to auction off her Virginity. Blah Blah Blah. Is a Virginity really worth anything now-a-days? Well apparently... it's worth 3.8 million dollars!!! That's right ladies. Your virginity can pay out better than winning the lottery! It will pay out if you put out! (Damn! If only I would have thought of this one...)


Here's the Story:
The fresh daisy, who goes by the pre-selected stage name of "Natalie Dylan," 22, set up a private auction through the HBO famed, Moonlite Bunny Ranch, a legal brothel in Nevada. This classy joint is obviously helping out a young girl to stand on her own two feet...or lie on her back. The top bid so far is a 39-year-old Australian, who is clearly single and for a reason.

So what's the fetish? Why do so many men find conquering a virgin to be the ultimate pinnacle of manhood? Let's ask the Muslims, shall we? The Muslim call them Houri and are described as "splendid companions of equal age (well-matched)", "lovely eyed" (as opposed to gimp-eyed?!),of "modest gaze","voluptuous","pure beings" or "companions pure" of paradise, denoting humans who enter paradise after being recreated anew in the hereafter.


Well i must admit that does kinda sound nice... but what about the 72 Virgins thing? Well The Prophet Muhammad was overheard saying (Overheard? You know it's not good to get facts from that crazy telephone game!) "The smallest reward for the people of Heaven is an abode where there are eighty thousand servants and seventy-two houri, over which stands a dome decorated with pearls, aquamarine and ruby, as wide as the distance from al-Jabiyyah to San'a." Hmm... so IN heaven, You're rich and have a thousand servants... Who are these servants by the way? Who's the unlucky bastard who gets to heaven and says "Okay I'm ready for my Houri!" and the angel goes "Well um you see, you've been assigned the role of "Servant" for Osama. Sorry about that." Wow.
Anyway so you have 1000 servants (poor bastards!), you're rich with gems (Um Thanks. I mean what is rent expensive in heaven? And who do you barter with to get some cash?)and now you have 72 virgins. Well GREAT! You have 72 women that you have to take care of, that all suck in bed. And I don't mean suck in the way they would like.

I mean that's what this Australian is going to be paying for with this "virgin" prize. Listen, the best sex comes after two people are comfortable with each other and are in-sync to each others sensitivities, nuances, and movements. Not f-ing some frigid, gold-digging, control freak, who's going to not move, or know how to make you feel good in any way, AND be in pain, maybe bleeding, and YOU'RE the one that caused it. You think girl's are bitches on their periods?!


That's assuming she actually IS a Virgin! I for someone to hold onto their Virginity until they were 22 and then want to immediately become a prostitute...that's not adding up for me. ANY girl could very easily fake it. YES, FAKE their virginity! If she didn't bleed, she could easily say that it's b/c she was an active teenager or used tampons. Alot of girls who play sports, ride horses, or bounce too much on their creepy uncle's knees, won't actually have much of a hymen anymore so they won't even bleed. So there's no guarantee that you'll even actually live out your Mother Mary fantasy.

OR if she really like the theatrics, (I'm guessing she does seeing is that her story was on CNN today) there ARE a couple of options to restoring your "virginity".
OPTION #1, Surgery! A Hymenoplasty. There is a fairly simple surgical procedure that will "restore your virginity". The price ranges form $1800-$5000, depending on the complexity of the procedure and how bagged-out the old love box is.


Or for only $14.90, you can buy the Artificial Virginity Hymen.
This seems pretty simple to use:
"Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable."

Wow. I'm down! Okay auctioning my virginity! Any bidders? ;)

I mean seriously folks. Look at how Male Virgins are perceived...nerdy, lack of self confidence, lonely...

And women are seen as the Mother of God! Literally!


So stop it everyone! Stop putting female virgins on pedestals. Let's get serious. NO ONE LIKES VIRGINS!! Let's all say it, "NO ONE LIKES VIRGINS! Let's all stop pretending that there's something special about it and that sex is not fun and better once you've had ALOT of it. Now I'm not suggesting slut-dom either. That's a whole different issue for a different blog. BUT Lots of Sex with your long-term partner of a reasonable intelligence and openness, is the Best Sex. So if you don't have one of those, I suggest looking on eBay for one. They're better than Virgins any day!


That's all for today, my fellow sinners!
xxx Gv your MC

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Seperation of Crotch & State

OH-Bama!
So here it is ladies, or Prop 8 fellas...I don't think I even have to make fun of this one.

For those who can't Love OBAMA enough....
"Head O State" Obama dildo



7 1/2 inches of the "BIG O", complete with blue balls.


Can't wait for the Obama Real Doll to come out!
BUT WAIT!! I know what you're thinking...But what about a JESUS dildo?! Especially for those who have the Loving Jesus complex we talked about the other day. Well my friends, look no further...


The Jesus dido boasts an "insertable length" of 7-1/4 inches. (Not quite as big as Obama) but it IS Glow-in-the-Dark! For those immaculate conceptions , I guess. This store even has The Devil, a Nun, Buddha, and The Grim Reaper dildo!

And for those who enjoy a little more kink...
THE BABY JESUS BUTT PLUG!



There's your sin for the day,
xxx
Your MC, Gv

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"Loving Jesus" scares me!

Have you ever googled the term "Loving Jesus"?
I'm sure you're trying it now, and you should.

It's the Children of God/Family International religion's (aka cult) term used to describe their sexual relationship with Jesus. That's right! Their SEXUAL relationship with Jesus.


I first came across this term when pondering the variety of strange and exotic things that people fantasize about, I thought, there must be women who fantasize about Jesus. I mean, who has better abs and is more powerful than the lord almighty himself? He's the original rockstar and his style rehashed by bands for nearly 2000 years. If Kurt Cobain and the Black Crowes have had swarms of groupies throwing themselves at their feet, surely Jesus has. Kurt Cobain is the #1 selling artist year after year, now beating Elvis, but no one sells more books than Jesus!


So I started my research, scouring the web for Jesus groupies or "messiah dates". I found miscellaneous women who admitted to thinking about the lord in a sexual or hot way (jokingly and not). The recent movie, "Hamlet 2" has the Irish-Catholic, Steve Coogan as the lord singing songs like "Rock Me Sexy Jesus".


But none were as satisfyingly creepy as the data I gathered on the "Loving Jesus" doctrine (introduced in 1995) from the wholesome and moral minds of the Children of God founder David Berg, and current leader Karen Zerby (Ber's widow).They deem it a "bridal theology" and takes this practice further than other Christians (Yes, other Christian sects practice something similar but not as extreme.) by encouraging ALL (young & old, women & men) members to imagine that Jesus is having sex with them during sexual intercourse and masturbation. Hmm. What if Jesus isn't your type?! That's gonna put a damper on this isn't it?

So wait! Not only are women supposed to fantasize about Jesus, but the men are too?! isn't that forcing all men to fantasize about homosexual sex? Which I quite enjoy, but Christians are taught that the Bible basically says "Gays are Evil!" and homosexuality in the The Family International religion warrants excommunication. So how does that work? Well the good founders have thought of that one already. Here's the solution: During intercourse, men are simply supposed to imagine themselves as a woman! That is why there's nothing gay about it! Uh....

Besides fantasizing about Jesus, all members are instructed to say "love words," or talk dirty, to Jesus as they are having sex. Karen Zerby has published a list of sexually explicit expressions that her followers should use during their booty call with Jesus.
Read the list of "Love Words to Jesus" here. I love dirty talk, but this may even be too sick for me!


Okay yes, this is strange and a bit unorthodox from the way I was raised, but hey they're not hurting anyone with their kinky exaltation. Are they? While "The Family of Love" makes regular claims that the sexual aspects of Loving Jesus are for adults only, since its inception, all aspects of the doctrine have been taught to and encouraged for to children from age 14 and sometimes 12. Don't worry, they of course don't have the same dirty talk vernacular that the adults (16 and up) do.

The fact that children are involved in their Octopus'Garden with Jesus, led to numerous reports of child abuse. Family leadership admitted that some children were abused from 1978 until 1986, then created policies prohibiting excessive discipline or any sexual contact between adults and minors. But when they enacted these policies and what these policies were, seems to be a clusterfuck off mangled answers. similar to a G.W. Bush press conference. The group also has a policy of not turning child abusers over to civil authorities, and only excommunicating members who abused children after July 1989. So I guess all those molested and abused before 1989, just have bad luck.

Oh there's plenty more gems from this creed. Not to be confused with the just as disturbing Creed, led by Christian rocker and veneral vicar, Scott Stapph infection.


If you want to know more, before my next glorious post on the group, read all about the "The Family" at their own website and even the practice itself. Which I do add they brilliantly have found erotic Bible verses to justify their doctrine. Genius!

Peace be with you fellow sinners,
xxx
Gv the MC

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My Original Sin

Hello Sinners!
This is the first post of a new series of social & political & psychological ramblings, photos, news articles, debates and much more, that I will be embarking on and hopefully you will come along for the journey.

This blog is about sexuality and things are are still considered taboo in the deeply religious, separatist Orange County, American society I live in. My point of view, from a recovering catholic truth-seeker.

I encourage you all to comment and leave your opinions on this blog and say whatever you wish. I encourage you to ask questions either anonymously or not. All sides are welcome to participate in the debate.

Peace Be with You,
MC

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