Masturbating Catholic: July 2009

OH SOOOO Many things to write about currently for the Masturbating Catholic. Where to begin?

Ok lets go for the obvious one, since the title of the blog starts with masturbation...Mr. Kung Fu himself, David Carradine - AutoErotic Fatality. For those who live in caves except for to read my blog every now and again, I have some belated news. David Carradine, actor & star of the Kung Fu & more recent bass-ass Tarintino Kill Bill movies, was found dead, hanging in the closet of his Bangkok hotel on June 4, 2009. His arms were tied above his head and his genitals were tied as well.
First a moment of silence... ... ... let it sink in... ... ... hold your breath... ... ... and release.

OK! This is one of my new obsessions (or new sensations - thank you Mr. Hutchence) as of late. It is a very fascinating topic. I mean it involves all the things humans are natural drawn to: sex, scandal, & death. Now normally this is the part of the blog where I make fun of said people's that I'm bringing to you today with my sarcastic wit. However, not in this case...well ok that's a lie...but I am interested in telling you about this very common practice of erotic asphyxia.

What is Auto / Erotic Asphyxia?
Erotic asphyxiation refers to intentionally cutting off oxygen to the brain for sexual arousal. It is also called asphyxiophilia, autoerotic asphyxia, or breath control play, scarfing, or the choking game. Colloquially, a person engaging in the activity is sometimes called a "scarfer" or "gasper". (Which is now my new name for Mr. Carradine, Gasper the horny ghost.)

History: (thank you wikipedia)
"The practice of autoerotic asphyxiation has been documented since the early 1600s. It was first used as a treatment for erectile dysfunction and impotence. The idea for this most likely came from subjects who were executed by hanging. Observers at public hangings noted male victims developed an erection, sometimes remaining after death (death erection), and occasionally ejaculated when being hanged. Note that, however, ejaculation occurs in hanging victims after death because of disseminated muscle relaxation; this is a different mechanism from that sought by AEA (autoerotic asphyxiation) practitioners." WOW. And we though hangings were inhumane and cruel. Wonder how Saddam went out? He seems more of a premature ejaculation type to me. Probably on the walk up to the podium.

Facts & such:
At least 1000 Americans (just think about how many there must be in Germany) die each year from this dirty deed done dirt cheap. And the common belief that it's just horny teen boys, or creepy old men, or serial killers, or rock stars, that do it is completely a myth. However, lots of young adults do try the practice during the course of their natural sexual exploration. Suicide is one of the most common causes of death for teens, however it's believed that many deaths ruled as suicide are actually autoerotic asphyxia. Police investigators may miss signs that might lead them to conclude it was a sexual accident, or family members may "sanitize" the scene before the police show up. They use the word "sanitize" to describe any tampering with a scene, but in this case - removing any pornographic materials, lubrication, sex toys, photos of Dr. Drew Pinsky (Mmm yummy) etc.

Safe ways to Practice:
hmm Not Really. Now I like a good kink just like everybody else and the BDSM community practices of "breathplay" generally include a partner. They use the acronym RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink). Hey nick Rack! Risk-aware? Isn't just regular sex Risk-Aware Sexual Kink? It should be YMDIYDTODA. Which in my community stands for "You may die if you do this. Okay Dumb Ass?"

I myself am a very sexual being and alot of you out there are too. So I've heard your stories. I've heard the "sometimes I like it if he chokes me a little - hehe" talk. I personally like to hang my head slightly off the bed until I feel light-headed and that's just when doing yoga. SO I'm not judging, in fact I am considering going out Gasper style one day when I'm about 115 years old. I think that would be cool. BUT until then BE SAFE. Do NOT hang yourself in your closet to have an orgasm. There are lots of other ways to get off in this day and age. Kids...put down the scarves and go back to stealing your parents alcohol or Ambien (NOT together!), and go back to masturbating the old fashioned way...to dirty pictures on the internet!

And now a word from my father:

Till next time, sinners! Blessed are the bleak.
Your MC, GV.