Sunday, May 16, 2010

Guest Blog From The Bastard Fairies

With the Pope once again confirming his ignorance by proclaiming that same sex marriage and abortion are the most "Insidious and dangerous" threats to the world today, one has to wonder if the Nazi quips leveled against him are actually pretty on the money. Hitler himself drew comparisons with his own push across Europe and the way Manifest Destiny was enacted in the America's. A large part of this was the proselytizing of the Catholic message, coupled of course with the threat of death if those being preached to did not comply.

The culmination of the westward thrust came during the 1890s, when the final Indian wars were over and the threat of the natives was made redundant. We are now 120 years on from that point and while the Catholic church may have lost its warring mentality with the onset of widespread democracy, it still holds a worrying influence on the susceptible minds of the believing public.

Imagine a Nazi regime that had won and maintained its influence of belief in the blue eyed purity of the Aryan race. 100 years on from world war II, in an evolved world - would this Nazi party of future times resemble the Catholic church of our time?. We can look at the Nazi policies as outlandish, but they are easily comparable to Catholic church policies spanning the last 500 years in their perverse quest for twisted justice.

The bible is so full of holes and so wonderfully contradictory that if the Pope understood that his organization, with all its flaws, was very much of this world and not based in the numinous, he could make steps to turn this debacle around.

For instance Mathew 26:24 has Jesus stating that "Woe to that man who betrays the Son of Man! It would be better for him if he had not been born." This passage is surely advocating abortion, if we are to utilize those same interpreting tactics of traditional Catholicism. Furthermore any version of the "love thy neighbor" theme could be construed as an endorsement of gay marriage.

However this has never been about bible interpretation, or the word of God, it is about power, and money, and the Pope's very huge, earthly ego which makes him believe he actually is infallible from the persecution of public opinion and stately laws.

Thankfully, those of us who are not drawn to such whimsical tales of yore, can see this archaic belief system teetering towards the beginning of the end. We must also understand to facilitate this downfall it may be better at this time to take a more softly softly approach to ushering people away. A helping hand in the opposite direction of sacred sperm and Sunday mass, and not too much emphasis on the parishioners rather doltish decisions of the past.


Saturday, May 15, 2010

Neil DeGrasse Tyson is a Recovered Catholic! The Cure?? SCIENCE!!

WATCH IT HERE (Turn the Volume UP!)

Tuesday, May 11, 2010


WOW! Aw our little baby Bene had learn a new word today... "Terrifying!"
YAY!!! Aw that's such a big word for such a little guy. Although Terror is nothing new to the Catholic Church, at least he used it in the context of describing the rality he has seen regarding the abuse "scandals".

Well... let me just say..REALLY? Really Pope? It's suddely terrifying now, but it wasnt so Terrifying when you were privy to the abuse and signing letters, and assisting in transfers or preists >you knew were molesting children to new cities so they could then molest new children for a while until they got caught again. And it also wasn't so terrifying to you when your closest friends and other high holy men were outed as part of a gay prostitution ring with teen boys. But now all of a sudden, it's terrifying.

Hmmm, Maybe you're terrified that you're about to be out of a job. Maybe you're terrified of not living in a palace under the guise that you are the man on earth whom is above all others and has a private chat line directly to God. Maybe you're terrified of people like me, calling yu out on your bullshit! Maybe you're afraid that other religions will rally behind an anti-theist such as me, to watch you go down to strenthen their own communities. Maybe you're terrified, that since we all found out that Mother Theresa didnt believe in God, that you don't have a miracle or a new Saint to throw at us to distract from the truth, Maybe you're afraid of your deep, dark, dispicable and disguisting secrets getting discovered as well...and I'm sure you've got some good ones. Well baby Bene, here's a new word... CLUSTERFUCK. You're sitting in the middle of one right now.

Well let me help you. Say 10 Haily Mary's and 2 Our Father's for every time a child, or any person, was abused, raped, sodomized, used, beaten, or worse. And then, I'm sure God will forgive you. He always does. But will they? And will we?

-Your MC,


Thursday, May 6, 2010


Well Happy May 7th...which is apparently NATIONAL MASTURBATION DAY. (It's May 6th according to one set of atheist bloggers, but everyone else seems to be in agreement for the 7th) AND May is National Masturbation MONTH! That's right folks!! A whole MONTH of Masturbation starting tomorrow!

Now many of you are probably already celebrating national maturbation month...some by choice, others not so married people. But hey! There's nothing wrong with masturbation. I quite enjoy it. I like it alone, or with a friend or seven. It can be just as good as sex (especially with a friend) and you dont have to worry about pesky things like STD's or creepy babies. You also dont have to worry about relationships, or mood swings, or feelings, or your parents, or school, or your bills, or a deity of some sort, nope. Nada. Not even the recession can slow masturbation down. It's even more carefree and enjoyable than medical marijuana. In fact, it's so great, they made a holiday for it. YEP! Happy masturbation day folks. Lube up those hands, or your favorite mechanical or old school toy and get going!!

BUT WAIT! Just like everything in life, balance is key. If you are new to may need a few cautionary warnings:

1. You CAN masturbate too much! 10 times a day aint gonna kill ya but it can give you ladies an infection and can cause irritation and chaving for men and women. So keep it to a reasonable 1-4 times a day and listen to your own body. If it hurts or burns alot, it's probably time to quit.

2. Cleanliness IS next to Godliness. CLEAN YO SHIT. Clean your hands, toys, Vaginer, Peni, your underoos, your bed, EVERYTHING! Use a mild soap and gently clean all bit and bobs before AND after entering the ring!

3. PEE! After you do the deed. Go urinate (preferably in a toilet but to each his own). This will help clean out any bacteria that may have entered the body.

4. DO NOT TRY THIS AT WORK! Okay I wouldn't but if you do, let me know b/c that sounds very exciting!

5. HAVE FUN! That's what National Masturbation Day is all about!

Feel free to email/comment your Masturbation Day Stories!
Till next time sinners.
Your MC GV